Selfish

by | May 14, 2020 | Uncategorized | 0 comments

Create your destiny. 

Do what feels right to you. 

Follow your heart. 

Only you know what’s best for you.

 Manifest what you want to see.

See? See God, I can do this. I know what’s best for me if I didn’t then why would the world encourage me to follow my heart? Why would the world show me the endless possibilities of creating the life I want to see? I think I have a pretty good hold on what I desire. You said that you’d give me my heart’s desire, right? So why haven’t I gotten what I’ve wanted? I’ve been patient. I’ve been nice to people. I go to church, I pay my tithes, I think I’m a good person… what’s up? Don’t you want me to be happy? I thought when I decided to give my life to you that things would have gotten easy. Also, how come when I call you, I feel like there’s no answer. (sigh) – Amen

 

Hey God, 

Ummm, it’s me again. I know you’re busy but I need you right now. I’ve been struggling in this marriage, these kids ain’t acting right, my money looks funny… the weight of it all feels like too much. I need help. Why won’t you talk to me? I trust you though. Can I get a breakthrough…can you come through soon? In Jesus’ name. -Amen

 

Often we come before God with I’s and me’s and the self-righteous notion that we have the power to control our own lives. The truth of the matter is we do have the right to do whatever we want. Just understand that comes at a cost. See, The God who created heaven and earth, who sent His only begotten Son to die on the cross for our sins, is a true gentleman. 

He’s the type of God, who is so dope that in His Sovereignty He still chose to give us free will and choice. There is not a thing that He will force us to do, but He will give us guidelines in His Word for us to govern our lives accordingly. Meaning if we so choose to serve Him(obey what His Word says), then he will bless us accordingly because He can not and will not lie.

 

The choice is up to us. 

 

What differences do you see in the above prayers? 

 

I have been saved (meaning I had given my life to Christ) since 2008. At the very beginning of my walk, God had spoken to me clearly in an audible voice. I’ll never forget, I was driving to work. Unfortunately, ever since that day, I’d yearn to hear God in the same way and it just didn’t happen. There were times where the Lord would speak to me audibly in certain circumstances, but it was never a conversation. There was never flow and I often wondered what was wrong with me. I would ponder to myself, how come I couldn’t hear God the way other people heard God. For the next ten years, I would sit and wonder in frustration. In that time I had grown accustomed to trusting somebody else’s perceived relationship with God and ability to hear, over my own. 

 

In 2018 it happened… I went through a very traumatic event and I found myself in a place where I yearned to hear the voice of God because I needed direction, and I didn’t have any. 

 

Panic consumed me, I had no idea what to do next, no idea how to move. 

 

The sheer desperation of the place that I was in made me feel like, well if you’re not going to talk to me then why am I wasting my time! Instead of wallowing in that negativity, I remembered that fateful day and those other sporadic times of hearing the Lord audibly. There had to be something that I was missing. 

 

One day I met this girl who was praying for people on Instagram. I took a chance and I asked her to pray for me. The next day as she lifted my prayer request she gave a word from the Lord. The Lord said, “ I’m not that complicated, why are you overcomplicating Me? What is the point of coming to me in prayer if you’re not gonna stay long enough to hear what I have to say? 

 

I can honestly say, that was a very pivotal point in my walk with God. It made me question everything that I’d been doing up until that point! Why was I over complicating God?

 

 Honestly, I wasn’t sitting still long enough to hear what He had to say. 

 

Notice in the last prayer above that there was a response. Sadly, I have at least 2 to 3 journals full of prayers that consisted of mostly one-sided conversational and formal prayers, none of which had responses. I say mostly because some of them had response scriptures that the Lord had led me to and they were spot on! 

 

 It wasn’t that God wasn’t speaking, it was that I wasn’t listening well.

 

Check it, God is not silent. He has a desire to have a relationship with His children! God speaks, we must come to a place where we have faith that 

 

  1. He is speaking.
  2. We take the time to build a relationship with Him enabling us to recognize the way He speaks to us. 

God speaks to us in various ways. 

For example, I ‘ve personally learned that: 

  1. He will speak in an audible voice 
  2. He will speak in dreams and visions
  3. He will speak in through other people
  4. He will speak through his word.

 

Often experiences are what connect people. Our shared experiences allow us to empathize with one another. Although this is my journey with Jesus, I believe it would be selfish not to share my experience. 

 

Revelation 12:11 King James Version (KJV)

11 And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.

 

Satan is determined to steal your voice, kill your confidence, and destroy your purpose. 

 

Revelation 12:11, lets us know that every believer can overcome him by the blood of the Lamb(Jesus) that was shed in His death and by our solemn declaration of how we got the victory (in what seemed like impossible situations) through God.

 

Many of us are going through times in our lives where things have been very hard. It has felt like these very situations could’ve taken us out. Let me just encourage you all today that, through Christ, WE WIN!! So before you give up, before you walk away ask yourself, “Have I made myself available to Him?” 

 

God created you for a relationship with Him…make sure it isn’t one-sided.