The Process: Give Him the Pieces of Your Mess

The Process: Give Him the Pieces of Your Mess

Have you ever saw a kid finger paint? 

Mine have. Typically you have no idea what in the world they’re painting but you call it beautiful anyway. I would dare say it’s not beautiful because of the array of colors but it’s beautiful because it was made with love.

 It was made by your child. 

It turned out to be a beautiful mess.


I think many of us would describe ourselves as such. There is something on the inside of us that e feel we are not getting quite right.. 

Some type of “roadblock” trips us up every single time and we sit and wonder what can God do with this? What can He do with all of these messy pieces? I can’t seem to make any sense of it, so how can He? Perhaps you’ve said to yourself, God can indeed fix this but then proceeded to try and figure out how.

Can I tell you something?


Trust is NOT figuring it out.


Proverbs 3:5

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;


When has God ever had to ask anyone to assist Him in handling any situation? He has not. If anything every time we’ve tried to assist God, we fail miserably, and then He has to clean that up too LOL. For example, God promised Abraham and Sarah a son. Looking at all the pieces of their situation, it looked impossible for that to happen. See Sarah was ninety-nine and Abraham was a hundred, she was like who finna have kids this late in the game?!


Genesis 18:12-15

12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, “After I have grown old, shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?”

13 And the Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh, saying, ‘Shall I surely bear a child, since I am old?’ 14 Is anything too hard for the Lord? At the appointed time I will return to you, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.”

15 But Sarah denied it, saying, “I did not laugh,” for she was afraid.

And He said, “No, but you did laugh!”


Let’s call a spade a spade. She didn’t believe it was gonna happen. So at some point, while she was waiting she thought it would make sense to assist God by having her husband sleep with her handmaid(insert facepalm). So now a baby was born and seeing how this was Abraham’s first kid, he probably did what every good father would do…be doting and filled with happiness. Unfortunately, this just made Sarah jealous. Jealous to the point she dealt with Hagar harshly, and then eventually sent her and her son away. 

That whole situation screams messy, but God likes the mess. Why? 

Simply put… where there’s a mess, God is willing and able to clean it up. Show up for you like a good and loving Father should, all the while working it out for your good. 


Romans 8:28 

28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. 

All you have to do is give Him the pieces to your mess.


I’m going to be transparent here. I’ve struggled greatly at giving God all the pieces to my mess because naturally, I’m a problem solver. If someone has a problem, then typically I feel like I have to find a solution. As of late, I realized that type of response isn’t always healthy. 

As a SAHM(Stay at home mom) with 5 children naturally I want to figure it out, so I know we’ll always be good. The thing is there was no way I could figure out an uncommon situation on my own. Most SAHM’s faced with becoming a single parent naturally are told you’re going to have to get a job.


Been there. Got two. God checked me BOTH times.

God says to me, “part of being obedient is trusting Me to provide everything you need even when you didn’t know you needed it. It doesn’t need to look like what everyone else is doing. It can be completely out the box, unorthodox, and supernaturally dope. Daughter, I just need you to trust Me even when you can’t see what’s next and everyone else thinks your situation looks crazy. Keep moving.” (This was in real-time and on time too)


Maybe you’re a mom who is trying to find her footing while doing this all alone.

Maybe you’ve come to a standstill in your life and need help in piecing together what’s next.

Maybe you’re unsure of what the problem actually is.

Let me do what I do best and help you solve a problem. 

Book a Heart HEaRt session and let’s get to the bottom of it from God’s perspective.

The Process:Trust

The Process:Trust

There I was faced with uprooting my entire life…what felt comfortable…what I’d made sense of…what I helped build. All of it was about to completely be torn down. 

Honestly, it didn’t happen all at once, it was gradual but it FELT like it was suddenly. At first, I was angry, then afraid because I couldn’t begin to figure out the HOW. My ex-husband and I had built a life for 8 years before we separated, we’d accumulated ALOT of stuff along with 5 children. There were many days where I would become so discouraged because fear was trying to trap me in the what if’s. 

What if you can’t afford to do this?

What if you never amount to anything?

What if you can’t buy anything? You don’t have anything saved!

Sooo naturally I did what anyone who was faced with moving would do….got a moving quote LOL.

Okay, I cried a little…procrastinated a bit…got frustrated at the thought of possibly losing all my stuff but after all THAT, I got a quote LOL. Now armed with this quote I figured all I had to do was throw away what I didn’t want.


Proverbs 3:5-6(NKJV)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

God began to deal with the root issue. It wasn’t uprooting, it was TRUST. I didn’t know how I was going to trust God amid absolute uncertainty. The only thing I knew was that I couldn’t go on any longer feeling frustrated at the clutter. When we separated, I downsized. There was stuff in my room, packed in the garage, in boxes in the hallway it made me feel so discouraged. Over time I organized but my room was like a closet. You know that closet where all your skeletons are, no one knows what’s really going on in there but you? Yeah, my room was like that. 

One day in the midst of sorting through what I wanted to keep, God began to speak. He said something like, “If you continue to hold on to all the old stuff then how can I replace it with anything new.” At first, that made sense, so I began to put things in the bag, not thinking twice. When I was done I felt good about it but…I left the bags in the room. I had to tend to the kids, and they were heavy so I’d give them away eventually. 

A few days later, I began to go through the bags again. I started to take stuff out of the bag trying to figure out if it could still benefit me keeping it. 

God swiftly told me to put it back! Reminding me to trust Him, reassuring me He was in control.

How often do we do that? We begin to go through the process of getting rid of things in our lives, but then go back and pick that thing up. 

We negotiate whether we really need to get rid of it.

Negotiate whether we should leave that abusive partner.

Negotiate whether to leave that job that hasn’t allowed room for growth.

Negotiate whether it’s worth cutting off those “friends” who only call you to drop off their problems but are never available when you need them.

Negotiate whether a schedule is truly beneficial for your business.

That last one is me telling on myself. For the record, I made the schedule but the discipline to follow the schedule is another story. 

James 4:17 New King James Version (NKJV)

17 Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin.


Of course in true God fashion, He comes in and checks me. Sigh

What has God been checking you about that you haven’t laid down yet? 

My question to you is, the very thing that no longer serves you (or may have never served you), why are you willing to hold on to it any longer?


Maybe you’re just unsure of how to let it go, or know something needs to go but can’t pinpoint what that thing is, or perhaps you need that push to get you to where you want to be…

Let me help you get over this hump and to that next place. Book a Heart 2 HEaRt today.




In this time it seems like hope is one of those fleeting words. The world around us seems like it’s in utter chaos, all the while we try to create an atmosphere of love.

Do you know? By surrounding ourselves with family, friends, and anything else that can preoccupy our time. 

First, we faced a global pandemic…life as we knew it got turned upside down. Jobs that told us we needed to be there unless we’d be fire or couldn’t work efficiently, became remote. The naysayers to homeschooling quickly found themselves teaching their children in the comfort of their own homes. Unfortunately for some, the home may not have been the safest place to be, but yet they were stuck there. 

Hope. It seemed fleeting. It seemed like a tease. When everything looked like it was going well, there was so much to hope for or look forward to. Then the news and fearmongering in the media hit like a ton of bricks. Like what is this? Just the day other everything seemed like it was alright, now just like that everything feels like it’s falling apart. 

Honestly, I had no idea what to write about this week. This morning in prayer God simply told me: HOPE. I’m like okay. To be honest I’ve been struggling these past few days with feeling overwhelmed. All the current events, the children, the business….I’m just like God, how? How am I supposed to do all of this? Especially in a time like this! 

His reply was simple, very calming. 

He said, “Baby girl I never intended for you to shoulder any burden on your own. Every little thing that you have going on, I care about. I care about the hurt and when you’re overwhelmed. I just want you to bring it to Me. You’re not in this alone…just listen for Me.” 

At that moment I was reminded of where my hope lies. Sometimes when too much is going on we lose sight of things that are right there in front of us because we magnify the issues, actions, people, things that are disrupting our peace. 

Take a moment and ask yourself, “what have I been allowing to disrupt my peace?” Take it a bit further and as yourself out of the things that have been weighing on you, how much of it can you control? Influence the outcome of? Where does my HOPE lie?


By definition, hope means 1: to cherish a desire with anticipation: to want something to happen or be true. To expect with confidence: trust.

Now there’s nothing wrong with hoping for something to happen, but it’s what or whom do you expect this desire to come to pass through. For example, if someone was hoping for marriage restoration ideally they would put their hope or trust in the other person to come to their senses and eventually come home. Right? Now I’m gonna tell you why this is faulty. Everybody has free will and choice. It’s kind of like throwing a coin in the air and wishing that it’ll land on your choice of heads or tails. The outcome is uncertain, there is no way to tell if the flip will be in your favor unless you was cheatin lol. Same thing with a person. The outcome is uncertain. God gives us free will and choice, and obviously, you cannot manipulate the person’s choice. 

Okay so let’s look at the biblical definition of hope.

Hope is defined by the belief that God will accomplish what He has promised.

This is based on the fact that God has always been faithful to do what He said He would do. It’s never just wishing something will happen. God is intentional and He’s very clear about where He stands with things. There is always divine certainty with Him.  

Psalm 71:5

For You are my hope; O Lord God, You are my trust and the source of my confidence from my youth.

The above psalm is saying that Christ is the actual object of a believer’s hope. This hope is alive. Jesus is alive! He is constant, He never switches up so hoping in the fact that there are no limits with God and nothing is impossible with Him (Luke 1:37), you have this reassurance that if you believe in Jesus a seemingly impossible situation is nothing to Him.

Typically when people speak about racism and injustice they speak about it from a defeated stance. Kind of like this has been happening since forever. Okay, so for argument sake, if this has indeed been happening since forever then why not go to the person who is NOT confined by time? God. 

There have been people who’ve pushed for change in perceivable unchangeable situations and guess what…things changed. There is nothing new under the sun and God ultimately has a plan. A sure plan. One without holes. One that will never fail. I think the thing that many of us miss is that although God is sovereign and can do what He wills, He still has put a responsibility on all who believe in Him to come and ask Him for what is needed in every situation.

Do the events in the world make me uneasy at times? Yes. 

Am I without hope? No, because Jesus is the ultimate hope. 

Regardless of if we acknowledge the work that He is doing in the earth. None of that changes who He is, what He wills, and what He is doing!  

What has been your view of who God is? 

Jeremiah 1:5a

 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee;

God already knew everything we’d become and He put everything we’d ever need as far as what we are purposed for in us, even before forming us in the womb. 

If He’s already done all of that, how much more will He do in this hour when things seem uncertain?

In my opinion, Jesus is the best HOPE dealer around, considering He is hope.

Where does your HOPE lie?

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I am a Relationship Consultant. I specialize in helping mothers of young children unpack and process traumatic events, that have resulted from a break down in a relationship with their spouse or partner. The goal is to assist you in hearing God’s heart concerning you and your situation. 

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